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Mommy Guilt and a Hex Come True

Little Angel

First 100% on a Spelling Test!

Back when I was a teenager my mother laid a hex on me; that one day I shall have a daughter that would be JUST LIKE ME…. it worked, oh boy did it work. Taylor is now six years old and full of spunk.  She would argue with a tree if it meant she would get to talk.  It is never-ending, she argues her point even after she realizes that she has no point left.

Much of her behavior issues are my fault. I am horrible at consistency. The last year or so has been so busy for me, trying to get through the nursing program.  I admit, there were times I let her win, instead of sticking to my guns when she was testing how far she could push me, I let her win.  At the time I was doing what I thought was best. Some of the times it was because I felt guilty that I couldn’t do the things she wanted to do because I had to study or go to clinical so I wanted her to be happy.  Other times I was just so overwhelmed with class, reading, finances, lack of sleep, cleaning, etc. that I just COULDN’T take another minute of being firm.  I gave in.

None of those little decisions were major, it isn’t like I let her play in traffic or with weapons, but they had dire consequences.  Now that she knows that I do actually have a breaking point she tries her best to hit it. Over.and.over.again. Nothing seems to phase her, time outs? Nope. spankings? Nope. Taking away toys? Nope.  Unfortunately at one point I resorted to bribing- it worked, to a point- the point that she became like a coin operated monster!

Park Fun

Park Fun

The most recent thing that seems to be working is a ticket system, we even went and bought a roll of fair tickets. I still need to set up a cute little container for the tickets (now they are in a bowl!) But it seems to be working.  I will be working on a post this week all about it and will share my worksheet for anyone that would like to try it.  It is a combination of several pintrest pins I found that were similar to what I wanted.  Basically she earns tickets through the day, some a set amount and some are ‘bonus’ tickets for good behavior (trying to reinforce the good more than punish the bad) and then there are consequences where she can loose tickets for certain actions. Then at certain intervals she can cash out tickets for various rewards (will also teach budgeting!). I am hopeful that if we can keep it going and grow it as she grows that we can make even more progress. I sure hope so!

Mommy guilt can have some serious consequences, in my case it was causing some major behavior issues in my little angel. I see myself in her every day, and I hear my mother’s voice come out of my mouth daily as well.  I am constantly finding myself realizing just what my mother meant when she said things that when I had NO IDEA what she was talking about- “give an inch, take a mile?” Yeah, I totally get it now.

Have and advice for us? I would love to hear it.  Has mommy guilt or mommy stress caused you to do parenting things you regret or would like to change?  Is this fixable or have I broken my kid? lol

 

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ENDED- The Hero of Color City – GIVEAWAY!

Giveaway ended- congratulations to Patty A! You have 24 hours to reply to the email I sent you with your mailing address! Thanks everyone!

Screenshot 2014-12-09 21.49.15

The Hero of Color CityI was lucky enough to get a review copy about an adorable movie being released on DVD and Blu-Ray tomorrow, Dec. 2, 2014- nursing school has taken over my life.  Not only is the movie cute and teaches children several life lessons but the company has partnered with a non-profit organization called nursing school has taken over my life; they collect crayons  from national and regional restaurant chains to donate to children in need.

This adorable movie follows Ben and his Crayons’ magical Crayon Box, which transports them to COLOR CITY, a world of dazzling hues, soaring fantasy and the whimsy of childhood. Find out what happens when crayons come to life in this charming new animated feature starring CHRISTINA RICCI,CRAIG FERGUSON, ROSIE PEREZ, WAYNE BRADY, JESSICA CAPSHAW and SEAN ASTIN!

My six-year-old loved the movie and has watched it twice today. I am ecstatic to be able to offer you the chance to win a FREE copy of the movie here. Super simple giveaway, just leave a comment letting me know why you think your child would like the movie and I will draw a random winner one week from today, on December 8th 2014. I will email the winner and announce here on the blog.

Because this is the fist giveaway I have hosted in quite a while, (nursing school has taken over my life!) I am keeping this one really simple, no extra or bonus entries- just a comment is all it takes. Feel free to share the post or any other for that matter though! Always appreciated! I finally graduate in May and am hoping to get lots more time to blog once I am settled in a job and working a normal schedule again!

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I got in!!! RN Class of 2015!

i-can-t-keep-calm-because-i-just-got-accepted-into-nursing-schoolFINALLY! Two years of prerequisites and co-requisites and I finally got the letter I have been waiting on- I got in!! I start classes in August and should finish in May of 2015. Life is going to change, I will be even more busy than I have been but at least I am on the final road now, no longer trying to make it to the main avenue!  

I have recently joined a gym to try to get rid of some of the ‘freshman 15 (50)’ I have gained, when we start clinicals in September our uniforms are all white- I so don’t want to be a marshmallow look-a-like! :-)

I am so excited to get started; our orientation is on the 25th and I wish it would get here already! I want to know everything!  I will be going to my mom’s in Dallas for about a month between orientation and when classes start so that will help keep me distracted I hope! Time has practically stopped since the letter got here! 

In other news- my daughter graduated pre-school last week- winning an award for being the most dramatic of her class….. yeah, proud parenting moment there!  It sure fits her though!  Her first day of kindergarten is also my first day of nursing school so it will be a exciting day all around!

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Time, Energy, Future, Present

Time, I have so much time, but it is filled with so much right now. When I am not in the middle of doing something I am thinking about what I need to be doing.  I am always trying to figure out my next move, the next assignment, the next appointment, the next test.  The amount of energy I have is not matching up with the amount of time I spend doing things.  My future is so close to me but it feels like a million miles away when I am lacing the energy to do the things I need to do right now. 

If only things were more simple, there are so many semantics that go along with every decision and every goal.  I want to become a nurse. I want to get my bachelors in Nursing… before I can do that I need to get into the Nursing program, but instead of being able to just apply and go – it has to be difficult, I understand having classes that need to be completed before you can apply, totally, I appreciate that, it makes sure you are serious before you can begin the program… BUT do they really have to only allow you to apply once a YEAR? Because I have ONE class left to finish I can not apply to the Nursing program next month. The program will not start until Summer, by the time I started the program that one last math class will have been done. But because I can’t apply I now have to wait a YEAR, NEXT march to apply. Adding a whole year to my schooling before I can work. 

The other option is to try to apply to another school 45 minutes from here, but that has a whole new set of problems, I have to work out the transfer, financial aid, credit transfer, just a lot of hassle. I am going to do it, it is worth it to finish my education a year sooner.  But it does not make it any easier to deal with internally.  Just so much stuff to work out…. 

That does not include the house cleaning, organizing, budgeting, a three year old that I swear is a 13 year old me in a tiny little body- so much attitude comes out of that little girl!  The biggest blessing is that Joseph started working again, my goodness that has been amazing, the level of stress that cured was outstanding.  I was terrified that he wouldn’t find a job- or that the job he did find would have crazy hours, low pay, and be worse than before. But by the grace of God he got his old job back, and it seems to be going well. Normal hours, more pay than unemployment, less stress, ahhhhhhh….. :-) 

It will work, I will get a degree, I will stay in school until I do- and I will love every minute of this crazy- stressful life!

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Mommy FAIL… did Easter early..

Easter Basket FAIL

So I work from home, I don’t get out much, in my head Easter was yesterday… we did the whole celebration- egg hunt, basket surprise, the works and then call my father-in-law to wish him a happy easter, the first in the series of planned ‘easter’ calls… well, what do you know- Easter wasn’t yesterday, it isn’t until THIS Sunday!   Ooops!! After I got over the embarrassment I decided to embrace it- it was pretty funny, I mean at least we didn’t forget it all together, we just did it a bit early! Right?

Easter FAILI still feel pretty bad for not being more on top of dates, I am horrible at forgetting family birthdays, never get Christmas cards out on time (if at all), something about me and dates just does not mix well!  For that matter when I write down dates I am still writing 2010 most the time!  Please tell me I am not the only one that sucks at this!

Easter FAILEven though it was the wrong date Taylor had a blast and the ‘real’ easter will be even better, this was a ‘practice run’!  Now she knows how to hunt for eggs so we will take her to the big city easter egg hunt and she will rock it!