Personal Growth Archives

New Year, New Me

The new year came and went, I barely stayed awake for midnight myself! One of my resolutions was to eat better and lose some weight. That resolution really became a need when I saw myself in some Christmas pictures, wow! So here we go, it is day four (I procrastinated starting my diet!) and so far I am down just two pounds but I feel confident that I can do better in the coming weeks. The plan is to try to post here as we go to keep myself accountable.

I would really like to lose at least 50 pounds by August, that is when I will be starting clinicals in Nursing school and our uniforms are all white… I will be nervous enough without having to get a HUGE white uniform that shows all my flaws!

One of my first steps is drinking more water- like any water is a change… I am horrible at drinking water usually. After four days of making sure I drink at least 60 ounces of water a day I am noticing that my skin is clearer and I am less itchy, and I am running to the bathroom like I am pregnant again but I am sure my body will adjust to actually being hydrated soon!

Stay tuned for updates and more pictures along the way, if you would like to join me in my journey let me know, I will be happy to add a link you your blog in future updates! Here we go!

Late Night ‘Mental’ Energy Surge

I hope I am not alone in this problem! I battle with insomnia pretty frequently, so often I am too tired to get a lot done that isn’t absolutely needed. At night when I am finally feeling tired and relaxed, trying to go to sleep I tend to get this amazing positive energy burst, at that moment; often 2am or later; I feel like I am going to be able to clean the house, organize the closets, dust the cobwebs; even work out the next day…. Then the next day comes and I am just as tired as the day before!

So, for about 30 minutes most nights I feel amazing, I don’t know if it is the relaxation that is giving me the false sense of being rested, or if I am just plain crazy. I have even tried to get up right then and start cleaning or working out- just to quickly peter out after about 20 minutes and feel like crud and head back to bed!

I am hopeful that one of these days I will wake up feeling as good as I imagine the night before; until then the clothes stay folded on the couch, the fans are dusty, and the cobwebs are happy. Has anyone else experiences this kind of feeling? Any tips to make it last to the next day?

Time, Energy, Future, Present

Time, I have so much time, but it is filled with so much right now. When I am not in the middle of doing something I am thinking about what I need to be doing. I am always trying to figure out my next move, the next assignment, the next appointment, the next test. The amount of energy I have is not matching up with the amount of time I spend doing things. My future is so close to me but it feels like a million miles away when I am lacing the energy to do the things I need to do right now.

If only things were more simple, there are so many semantics that go along with every decision and every goal. I want to become a nurse. I want to get my bachelors in Nursing… before I can do that I need to get into the Nursing program, but instead of being able to just apply and go – it has to be difficult, I understand having classes that need to be completed before you can apply, totally, I appreciate that, it makes sure you are serious before you can begin the program… BUT do they really have to only allow you to apply once a YEAR? Because I have ONE class left to finish I can not apply to the Nursing program next month. The program will not start until Summer, by the time I started the program that one last math class will have been done. But because I can’t apply I now have to wait a YEAR, NEXT march to apply. Adding a whole year to my schooling before I can work.

The other option is to try to apply to another school 45 minutes from here, but that has a whole new set of problems, I have to work out the transfer, financial aid, credit transfer, just a lot of hassle. I am going to do it, it is worth it to finish my education a year sooner. But it does not make it any easier to deal with internally. Just so much stuff to work out….

That does not include the house cleaning, organizing, budgeting, a three year old that I swear is a 13 year old me in a tiny little body- so much attitude comes out of that little girl! The biggest blessing is that Joseph started working again, my goodness that has been amazing, the level of stress that cured was outstanding. I was terrified that he wouldn’t find a job- or that the job he did find would have crazy hours, low pay, and be worse than before. But by the grace of God he got his old job back, and it seems to be going well. Normal hours, more pay than unemployment, less stress, ahhhhhhh…..

It will work, I will get a degree, I will stay in school until I do- and I will love every minute of this crazy- stressful life!

$649 for Books…

Wow, went and bought my books for college, $649 for four classes and I still need to go get a lab coat, back pack, and some other misc things… Can’t believe books cost that much! The anatomy class books alone were $249!!

New Year, New Blog, New Me…

I have let a lot of things slip this year, not everything but a bunch of things I shouldn’t have. My blog has been one of them, I have been so focused on school and my scrapbook hobby that I forgot how to include the blog into all of that.

I think this new theme will help with that; the old theme required a full post every time, otherwise it just looked funny. With this new format I can post a quick update, a gallery of images (scrapbook pages maybe), or any sort of post and not mess up the design.

One thing I really want to focus on in 2012 is not stressing so much, the quote pictured here sums up how I feel about all the stress I have; it’s a waste. So what if the bed does not get made, or if I cheat on my diet; tomorrow is still going to be here and I need to enjoy today; regardless of what is going on in my life.

I start my next semester of college this week, I actually pick up my books tomorrow! I am super exited about that (a little nervous too!) I am really hoping to get accepted into the nursing program in March even though it will be a long shot because technically I am not eligible until NEXT march I still have one prerequisite to finish. However, I have a 4.0 GPA and have already completed many of the classes that didn’t have to be taken until after I start the program. It all depends on how flexible they will be… it wouldn’t be such a big deal if they took applications more than once a YEAR!